I am at a Starbucks, trying to set up a budget spreadsheet and get my finances organized.
I'm a little irritated but I think that's because I forgot to take my medicine this morning. I will take it when I go back to Lena's house, though I hate to be around her feeling like this. She will understand, though, that I just need a minute. I worry too much.
I'm wrestling with whether to close my checking account. When Hancock Bank was bought out by Whitney, WHITNEY started charging me $7 a month for the account, whereas Hancock charged me nothing, ever. So I got a prepaid debit card that is free with my direct deposit and charges $3 a month as a maintenance fee IF I deposit (not maintain; just deposit) less than $1000 a month. Which, with God's blessing, I am paid more than $1000 a month so there would be no charge. Just, if I ever needed to cash a paper check, it would be a hassle without a private checking account. Right now my balance is $0.00 with nothing pending. Maybe I should just close it. Maybe I should close it before they decide to close it for me. But I have awful credit, so opening another account in the future might be hard for me or impossible. I don't know. I just don't know.
I do know I need to pay my tithe for God's blessing. But lately I hate my church so I don't want to pay them a dime. I wonder if God counts as tithing when you use your 10% to support the Kingdom in some other way. Like things Jesus would do, like being kind to the poor or supporting a battered women's ministry. Gotta pray about that.
It rained like crazy last night. Guess who forgot to close their sunroof. Yep, real nice. Real nice. LOL
Tomorrow is my brother Matthew's birthday. I need to do something nice for him. He has expressed feeling overlooked since my little nephew was born on 8/8/2005. Their birthdays are 4 days apart so Matt's kinda gotten lost in the childhood birthday party mayhem since then. I love my Matthew. Gonna get him a gift if I can think of what he might like. He's into... guns and... well, guns... that's all I really know. He loves guns and Ron Paul. Hmmmm. hehehe...
All I really know is, God is in control. He really has no competition. A bunch of people got laid off where I work Friday. The survivors clustered in groups around the plant and spoke quietly of the casualties, like little support groups after a tragedy. It made me realize how fleeting are things we can label "security." But there's no sense in worrying about it... that won't change anything.
Okay. Back to the budget, and doing the best I can with what I have now. That's all I can do. I have no control over anything else.
