Goodbye, Michael

He achieved more than most music artists of all time. He led a unique life, changed drastically and fought criticism. He was accused of things of which the public will never know his true guilt or innocence.



Everybody has a Michael Jackson story. He died suddenly, shockingly, and hopefully went to a better place. Maybe God knew he had all the stress he could take. I feel compassion for the man and for his family.



His life was different from mine, but I do relate to him on the level of feeling different from people around you, expressing yourself, and being rejected as a result. We are all human, and all at least a little alike somewhere on the inside. I find inspiration in that.

Goodbye, Michael.

"Childhood" Written and composed by Michael Jackson.

Have you seen my Childhood?
I'm searching for the world that I
Come from
'Cause I've been looking around
In the lost and found of my heart...
No one understands me
They view it as such strange eccentricities...
'Cause I keep kidding around
Like a child, but pardon me...
People say I'm not okay
'Cause I love such elementary things...
It's been my fate to compensate, for the
Childhood
I've never known...

Have you seen my Childhood?
I'm searching for that wonder in my youth
Like pirates and adventurous dreams,
Of conquest and kings on the throne...

Before you judge me, try hard to love me,
Look within your heart then ask,
Have you seen my Childhood?

People say I'm strange that way
'Cause I love such elementary things,
It's been my fate to compensate,
for the Childhood I've never known...

Have you seen my Childhood?
I'm searching for that wonder in my youth
Like fantastical stories to share
The dreams I would dare, watch me fly...

Before you judge me, try hard to love me.
The painful youth I've had

Have you seen my Childhood.

Music in the Morning

Things that have crossed my mind lately:

Yesterday, walking from work back to the bus stop in the afternoon, the dry grass crunched beneath my feet. I prayed for rain soon... then rethought my prayer and asked for the rainfalls to be scheduled intermittently around the times Carrie and I will be moving this weekend. I figure if God can make it rain, surely He can also schedule the rain around what I need to get done. :o) Then I thanked him for the tiny cloud that rested in front of the sun, if only for a moment... it was a nice moment. Been close to 100 degrees the past 2 days!

I have been making bus friends. :o) One is a girl I talked with for a length of time outside a grocery store waiting for a bus on the way home. I've seen her two or three times since then and we always wave. Two is a chick in a scrib suit who works in a nursing home and loves to talk about her life... merging into new topics at a pace so rapid I can usually not keep up... and I find her hard to understand so usually I just nod, or change the topic to something I feel like talking about. She doesn't seem to mind... or notice. :) But she's friendly, and that is nice.

Three, is a girl I've seen a few times. She works at the Wendy's over by Siegen WalMart. Very thin girl, very dark skin, and these sunglasses that curve around the sides of her face giving her head this cool aerodynamic look. We have talked on a number of occasions. She's nice. Yesterday we spent about 30 minutes on a bench together... waiting, always waiting... and talked a lot until scrub suit chick showed up and comandeered the conversation. For a while there, sunglasses chick and I were sitting there, both leaned forward with our hands clasped and faces down... I laughed inside, thinking it looked like we were having a prayer meeting at the bus stop. *grin* Later I joked with her that if she had some change we should go in the car wash behind us. She could go into one stall, I suggested, and I could go into another, and each get a hose... and have a water sprayer fight. She thought that was a grand idea... but we stayed on the bench.

I know none of these people's names; just their faces, and the same in reverse. But they make my commute-ay that much nicer.

Today a very kind guy gave me change for a $5. Learned after entering the bus that the money machine only takes change and $1's. Always wondered about that... at least now I know. He gave me change for my $5 and I thanked him at least 2 or 3 times. :o)

Tigers lost last night. Sorry to my TX friends, but this is where we will have to part ways for a time. You WILL have your longhorn asses handed to you on a baseball platter this evening. :o) No matter where I roam, I will always be a Tiger fan first and foremost!!

Alright. Off to face the day. Weeeeeeeeeeeee...... heh...

Latina Music and a Torn Lampshade

I'm thinking I should possibly find some line of work I could do from this comfortable chair in CC's on Bluebonnet & Perkins. I think that would suit me just fine.

I've been praying this morning for help to not care what my boss thinks about me. Or about what she more than likely spouted off about me during my absence on Friday. She talks about EVERYBODY behind their back to everybody else. Surely I am not exempt. The harsh realities of life in this world of grownups who still act like children... hmmph.

Carrie and I have a lot to do this week. On Saturday, we went and saw the place we'll be living. It is TINY. Literally we were trying to come up with engineering schemes as to how we will fit two birdcages in there plus three cats and a Luna. Tight quarters... but we will make due. Like Jennifer Aniston's character said in "Marley and Me," "Home is wherever we are." I like that.

So, no, I don't want to go to work today. I need to look for another job. Start calling around again. That's the beauty of temp assignments. When they start pissing me off, I can leave in a crafty way so as not to burn bridges. As far as life and work history and credit ratings... I've already screwed up all that... so I'll just do my best day to day and not worry about the rest.

Sometimes I just want to run...

But I know that when I got there, wherever "there" ended up being, I would miss what I left.

So I stay, live day-to-day, and get by... wishing I had more friends from whom to get a little help. :o)

Lot of packing to do this week. Lots of moving to do this weekend. Lots of schoolwork to do simultaneously.

But in a year, I will have a power-packed master's degree that will have me set to earn a LOT more money than I do now, and set to BE the person who calls the shots instead of the mere underling to whom the shots are dealt.

And I will spend some of my days working from a computer in a comfortable coffee shop chair, just like I am right now.

There is hope even yet.

Life Through My Lens

I did not go to work today. I had quite enough of that whole stew pot this week and so, having ridden the bus almost all the way there, I decided I was not going. Coincidentally, I instantly became sick and had a doctor's appointment. Pretty neat how life works like that......

The fam is having a Fathers Day event tomorrow. Carrie and I plan to attend. She has not yet met the majority of my dad's side of the family. I would worry she might be bored, but where we're going, there will be a pool. So... she will be pleased as a peach. I love my sweet C.

So, for some time now I have been meaning to post this blog... of a group of pictures I took... on my walk to work.

Here is the CC's where I often get off the bus. This is not my FAVORITE CC's, but it is the one that is a part of this story. I do like it there...













So, outside...



And to work we go. Fun, fun... here is Olive Garden... I like the red chips out there; very pretty.



So, Siegen Road is where all this takes place... and this sign stands there to remind me that I still owe money to Conn's. Which I guess propels me further toward my place of employment.



The place where there are no options....



And I mosey my way on to the beginning of the road called Industriplex. And there begins the long leg of my journey.



This is an address from the end of the street where I start out. My work is at 11999.



This is the grass that used to make my toes wet. Before I threw that pair of boots away......



I have been to this place maaany, many times to pee in a cup for this or that job or interview. That's kind of sad... to be so familiar with a pee-in-the-cup facility. I even left my cell phone there once. We've gotten to know one another...





It was cloudy that day. This is my least favorite field to walk through when there are no clouds... because it is a vast plane of shadelessness. It has been HOT lately, too!



Value the small things... :o)




This is the bridge I cross every day. I love living on the edge, boy..... heh...



And here we are.

Presenting RJ!!

This is RJ! Carrie put down a deposit on him/her at a Bird Fair this past Saturday. The breeder thinks it's a girl but we will find out soon enough through a DNA test.

RJ is a Crimson Macaw. She's only 16 weeks old! Her chest will broaden some more and her tail feathers will grow longer, but she's pretty near to full size already. The breeder said macaws are born out of eggs about the size of chicken eggs and just kind of explode in growth!

RJ ("Rocco Jr.") is SO SWEET!!!!!!!!!!! Carrie is taking Roxy to the Avian Vet this Friday just to make sure she's all well, and then we will bring RJ home from the breeder.

(Have to make sure lil Roxy doesn't have anything that could be passed to RJ. Roxy was a rescue from a home where she was neglected, never bathed, and never taken to the vet! She seems healthy but we just need to make sure.)

I am so excited about our new family member!!