Hear What I'm Not Saying

I had the weirdest dream last night. So weird that, when I woke up in the middle of the night, I emailed my friend Ana because she was the main character in the dream besides me. Here is a copy of the email with interpretations I looked up and inserted later. (I got the interpretations from http://www.dreammoods.com)

I was in some sort of trouble, or had done something wrong, but I needed help.

Help - To dream that you are calling or signaling for help, suggests that you are feeling lost, overwhelmed, and/or inadequate.

...I was unstable and either just really emotional or on something. You were the calm, stabilizing factor in the dream...

Calm - To dream you are calm denotes a fulfilling life. You find contentment and satisfaction in what you have.

Friend - To see friends in your dream, signifies aspects of your personality that you have rejected, but are ready to incorporate and acknowledge these rejected aspects of yourself. The relationships you have with those around you are important in learning about yourself.

...kind of serving as a liaison between me and the people on the other side of what was going on.

...This was a very strange dream.

Anxiety - To dream that you are experiencing some anxiety in some affair, is a reflection of what you may be feeling during your waking life. You may have repressed thoughts, unexpressed emotions, resentment, and hostility that are triggering your anxiety dream.

Confusion - To dream that you are confused may reflect your true confused state of mind and the nonsensical events of your dream. Isolate the single element in your dream that is confusing to you and analyze the meaning of that particular symbol. Alternatively, dreams of confusion signifies that you are being pulled in opposite directions or do not know which viewpoint is right.

Distress - To dream you or others are in distress represents worries and unhappiness in your waking life.

Fear - To dream that you worse fears are coming true, signifies your resistance to change. You are afraid to confront the unknown aspects of yourself.

...I was not talking,

Silence - To dream that you are silent, indicates an inability to express yourself. You may feel inhibited in voicing your opinion and how you really feel.

...but you were able to interpret what I wanted to communicate. You arranged a meeting between me and two other people... my mom and someone else.

Meeting - To dream that you are in a meeting, suggests that you are learning to accept various aspects of yourself and integrating these various parts.

...I think I needed to be hospitalized for whatever was going on and the goal was to get me to agree to go.

Hospital - To see or dream that you are in a hospital, symbolizes your need to heal or improve your physical or mental heath. Alternatively, it suggests that you are giving up control of your own body or that you are afraid of losing control of your body.

...The meeting was in some sort of train depot setting.

Station - To dream that you at a station, represents a transitional period in your life.

...Outdoors under a wooden porch-type of covering.

Shade - To dream you are in the shade symbolizes protection. There is something that you are trying to keep hidden.
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...You sat down in one side of a swing... the kind of swing on a swingset, where kids sit facing each other...

Swing - To see a swing set in your dream, indicates memories from childhood. You may feel a need to escape from your current responsibilities and relax.

...except this was longer; more space between the two facing seats. I started to climb into the other side of this swing but you waved your finger at me and said, "Ah ah ah..." like, no, don't get on there. I understood that it would not support the weight of two people.

Weight - To dream of your own weight represents self-worth, self-esteem, influence or power or persuasion. It is also indicative of the burdens you carry in life. To dream that you are overweight suggests that you are feeling over-burdened and pressured. You may be carrying too many responsibilities.

...You pointed to a chair on your left.

Chair - To see a chair in your dream symbolizes your need to sit down and take time out to contemplate a situation before proceeding. Or you just need to relax. To dream that someone is offering you a chair, suggests that you need to be open to taking and accepting advice.

...I sat there.

Sitting - To dream that you are sitting, indicates your indecision and not knowing what you want to do with yourself in the near future. It may also suggest that you are idle and doing nothing.

...It was like... in the formation of a dining room table. You were at the end on the right, I was on the long side to your left, then my mom and the other person

Mother - To see your mother in your dream, represents the nurturing aspect of your own character. Mothers offer shelter, comfort, life, guidance and protection.

...came and sat on a bench across from me.

Bench - To see a bench signifies your tendency to procrastinate and put things aside. It also suggests you often take on a passive role instead taking initiative.

...The chair and the bench were made of elaborately designed metal, like iron,

Iron - To see iron metal in your dream, symbolizes harshness, anger, aggression, ruthlessness, and conflict. On a positive note, it may signify strength, endurance, and willpower.

...with lots of swirls and fleur de lis.

Fleur De Lis - To see a fleur de lis in your dream, symbolizes spiritual power and control.

...I looked at you and you nodded, handing me a drawing tablet

Paper - To see a blank white paper in your dream, signifies your desire to make a fresh start in your life. You need to express yourself through writing or art. Alternatively, it suggests that you need to work on being more communicative. To see a stack of papers in your dream, denotes overwhelming responsibilities and stress that you are having to cope with. You are not effectively dealing with the issues at hand.

...and... charcoal or something.

Crayons - To see crayons in your dream represents a period of time where you were more carefree. It is also symbolic of creativity. You may need to think outside the lines into more unconventional thoughts and ways of doing things.

...I remember, I was very scared but you made me feel safe.

Security - To dream that you have a sense of security, suggests that you may be experiencing much insecurity in your waking life. The dream is compensating for your lack of security. You need to feel well-protected, both physically and emotionally.

...I knew you wouldn't let anything happen to me. You encouraged me that it was ok to express myself and let people know what was going on inside me.

...You talked to my mom and whoever, and I started drawing.

Drawing - To dream you are drawing, represents an expression of your latent creative and artistic abilities. You need to show your creativity in your waking life.

...I wasn't listening to what you guys were saying; like a little girl, off in another world while her mom is talking to adult friends.

Ignore - To dream that you are ignoring someone or being ignored, represents some aspect of yourself which you are not paying enough attention to.

...I finished my picture and handed it to you.

Surrender - To dream you surrender suggests you need to rid yourself of past emotions and habits

...I was searching your face

Search - To dream that you are searching for something, signifies the need to find something that is missing or needed in your life. You may be searching for love, spiritual enlightenment, peace or even a solution to a problem.

...to see if you understood my work. You looked me in the eyes for a minute, searching MY face to make sure you understood, and smiled. You reached over and took my (right)hand,

Hand - To dream of your hands represents your relationship to those around you and how you connect with the world. Hands serve as a form of communication. The right hand symbolizes masculine, active attributes. To dream you are holding hands with someone represents your connection with that person.

...squeezed it softly, and said, "It's going to be okay." You turned to my mom and the person, and said, "She's agreed to go." You got that from my drawing. I was glad because I had known you of all people would understand.

...I was still scared, but I knew it would be okay... whatever it was.

Beddie Bye

Time to go to sleep. I'm tired a little and know I need to go to bed, though I'm dragging my feet... well not actually as I am in bed... what to do with me, hahaha...

I have decided that Nasal Decongestants are a gift from God. I've been starting to have another of those horrible earaches again and this evening I found a way to help it drain. Let's have a moment of silence in thanks....

Tomorrow I go again to my really cool job. I am SO grateful for this job!!

My sweet love has been asleep for awhile. She lights my life. I think I'll join her. :o)

Night Out

Went with Carrie tonight to hit a few stores. Didn't get a lot of what we had set out for but got a few things we needed and a few things we... decided we needed... heh...

On the way there, she suggested we eat out and I was in total agreement. We haven't really been out to do something fun in awhile. We ended up at the Hollywood Casino by the river. The buffet was overpriced and not as impressive of some of your cheaper variety buffets, but it was fun. We played a few machines. Overall I think Carrie won $2 and I was in the red. But hey, it was just for fun. We had a really nice time and spent some good relaxing time together. We needed that.

There is a cat who hangs out outside a store near our house. He is SO sweet and cute... looks just like my Vladimir only without the white socks. We gave him some food this evening. I have named him Smokey Lonesome like the homeless guy in Fried Green Tomatoes... plus the store fronts the railroad track that passes through the center of town. Sweet.

My Vladimir... :o) That's him up top, a few months ago. He gets bigger and stronger and sturdier every time I look away from him for a minute! So... later!

Nice night out with my Boo.